Chapter 17: Please Leave My Life

To the world, you may be just one person;
but to someone, you are the entire world...

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Lu Huaining smiled gently and said, “Come here, I have something to tell you.”

The two gazed at each other tenderly, as if the world had shrunk to only the two of them.

Madam Lu did not wish to disturb them. She stood quietly, stepped outside the hospital room, and closed the door.

Seeing the others leave, Lu Huaining took the opportunity to pull her into his embrace, softly pressing a kiss on her eyelids. With a commanding tone, he said, “No more crying. Your eyes are swollen like walnuts. If you cry yourself blind, how will you count money later? You little money lover, I promise I will get better—just give me some time.”

She heard his playful words but could not smile; her heart ached. He pinched her cheek gently. “But I don’t like a boss lady with swollen eyes. If you want to stay by my side counting money, then rest well, smile more, and no crying, understand?”

Though his body was tormented, he wished for her happiness.

“Mm.” Xue Zuining suddenly opened her arms and wrapped them gently around his waist, resting her cheek against his broad chest. Softly, she said, “Huaining, I will treat you well from now on.”

“How well?” Lu Huaining traced her hairline, resting his head near her hair’s crown, then chuckled softly.

“Very, very well…” Xue Zuining silently vowed in her heart. She would love this man wholeheartedly, filling even the void left by her mother’s absence.

Lu Huaining planted a kiss on her raven-black hair. “I’m sleepy. Go tell Grandma to get a good rest. She’s been unwell and worrying about me; she can’t be overexerted. You should rest early too. Stay with me like last night when I sleep; maybe I’ll recover faster.”

“Mm.” She kissed his brow and smiled softly.

He loosened his grip, watching her stand up to straighten her clothes before leaving the room for the outer chamber. The door was unlocked, and her gentle voice drifted faintly back inside. He listened for a while but could no longer resist sleep’s pull and soon drifted into a deep slumber.

Lu Huaining’s condition stabilized; unlike the previous day, there was no recurrent bleeding. Madam Lu’s taut nerves eased somewhat, and the exhaustion she had been masking dissipated. Now, she was merely a weary elder. After Xue Zuining relayed Lu Huaining’s concern, her heart felt much more at ease, and she reclined on the sofa in the outer chamber.

Xue Zuining had a nurse bring a blanket over and waited until Madam Lu fell asleep before returning to Lu Huaining’s side. Madam Lu watched her silhouette silently, lost in thought.

That figure was so familiar, as though it were the young Zhong Yilan herself.

Xue Zuining freshened up briefly and lay down beside Lu Huaining, carefully pulling the covers over both of them. She held his arm, enveloped by the warmth of his scent, feeling a gentle comfort.

This man loved her; she knew it, and she was determined not to betray that love.

Unable to sleep, her fingers softly brushed his cheek, then traced down his neck, resting on his stomach. She dared not press her full hand there, fearing any added pressure. Her arm grew tired holding that position, yet she did not want to withdraw her touch. She had known stomach pain before—not severe, but excruciating—and he had vomited so much blood. How much pain must he have endured?

He must have been thinking of her, thousands of miles away, but she had never truly sensed her lover’s pain.

She did not know when she fell asleep. Early the next morning, the doctor came in; he was still unconscious. She hurried to have him examined, washed her face, then went to buy breakfast for Madam Lu and herself. They ate quietly and then checked on Lu Huaining, seeing his complexion improve brought them some relief.

Madam Lu turned to Xue Zuining and said, “Miss Xue, come with me outside. We need to have a serious talk.”

Some matters cannot be avoided; they must be faced head-on.

Xue Zuining’s heart leapt as if suspended by a thread in midair. She clenched her fists quietly and followed Madam Lu to the outer room, sitting face to face.

Time passed silently, each understanding the other without words.

Madam Lu, accustomed to strict standards, was tense and weary from worry. She had not changed clothes since arriving and looked tired and worn, her face pale. She feared that once she calmed, her displeasure might surface.

But at this point, matters were beyond anyone’s control.

Madam Lu’s first impression of Xue Zuining—though they had never met before—was clear: when one dislikes a person or thing, one unconsciously magnifies their faults. She brushed her hair aside helplessly. It was what it was; they would have to deal with it as it came.

Yet, surprisingly, Madam Lu’s gaze was calm and even showed a hint of warmth.

Xue Zuining steadied her breath, maintaining a composed smile, waiting quietly for the other to speak.

“Yesterday, Huaining told me everything. Many facts were beyond my expectation. First, I must apologize for his shameful behavior and also, on behalf of the Lu family, apologize to you and your mother. Though I understand your suffering cannot be mended by apologies.”

Xue Zuining was taken aback but replied, “This is not your fault. As a junior, I feel embarrassed to have an elder apologize on my behalf.”

“Seems Lanlan truly educated you well. She has always been magnanimous; I was mistaken in my judgment.” Madam Lu sighed and apologized, “I failed in raising Huaining properly. Our so-called marriage was only a facade. More so, I concealed the truth about Huaining’s biological mother, so his father treated him coldly. The woman he called mother was warm only on the surface. Thus, we were strict, even harsh, with his studies and behavior. We failed to give him the care he needed. His cold and aloof nature today is our fault.”

Xue Zuining lowered her eyes, recalling how he once mentioned having to take medicine himself as a child, while servants only obeyed the master’s mood, no one truly cared for him. Her heart ached.

“I don’t want to meddle too much in your affairs. As his grandmother, I only wish for my grandson’s well-being.” Madam Lu sighed deeply, her gaze fixed on the door to the inner room before quickly returning to Xue Zuining. She looked at her earnestly. “Miss Xue, our families share a history. I have made mistakes before, but this time, I cannot afford to err again.”

With age comes a mellowed heart. Arguments lose meaning. What she hoped for now was simply the joy of a full family.

Xue Zuining stared wide-eyed at Madam Lu, heart pounding wildly. For her magnanimity, she did not know how to respond or explain her four years of vanishing without a trace.

After a long silence, Madam Lu said, “I don’t wish to revisit past grievances. I believe you understand the burdens of the Lu family’s high status. Honestly, you are also innocent. Huaining owes you, and repaying that debt is his lifelong responsibility. He cannot live without you. I will no longer make things difficult for you. I tell you all this to say: your relationship with Huaining must remain secret for now, as his engagement to Wan Yi still stands. Revealing the truth would only hurt all three of you. We must consider carefully before deciding our next move.”

Xue Zuining pressed her lips, replying, “I understand.”

Madam Lu sipped her tea, trying to calm her tumultuous emotions. After a moment, she said, “I heard you’re married.”

Xue Zuining’s heart skipped, but she could only nod. Seeing the sharpness in Madam Lu’s eyes, her heart leapt again.

The shadow on her face lasted only a moment before she regained composure and warmth. She looked at Xue Zuining and said, “I trust you have your reasons, but please don’t hurt Huaining anymore.”

Xue Zuining thought for a moment and replied, “I understand your meaning. I will handle my affairs promptly and not cause unnecessary trouble.”

Madam Lu nodded. “If you need help, just ask. Neither Huaining nor I will stand by idly. The Lu family may not command the wind and rain, but we still have power you can rely on.”

“Thank you, Madam.” Xue Zuining smiled in agreement, but her heart remained firm. Many things were better left as they were.

Madam Lu’s expression softened a little. “Miss Xue, if you and Huaining are to continue together, there will be many challenges ahead. Family issues are one part; Huaining carries many responsibilities. As his partner, you cannot be a woman who only supports from the sidelines. I don’t expect you to have total control like him, but you must integrate into his circle. Formal social occasions are not just about flaunting jewelry and gowns like on television. Connections are built amid the clinking of glasses. Leaders take their spouses on visits; you must have heard of ‘spousal diplomacy,’ right?”

Recalling her own youth, Madam Lu advised her earnestly, “Improve yourself, support your husband. Though it sounds hard, if you don’t, the distance between you will grow. Passion can ignite love in an instant, but for it to last, it requires effort. Life with Huaining won’t be the romantic, carefree existence a young girl imagines. Prepare yourself.”

“I understand. Thank you for the reminder, Madam.” Four years ago, Xue Zuining might have dreaded such a life. Now, she faced it calmly.

Madam Lu said, “Bear with it a little longer. When Huaining recovers, I will find the right time to make your relationship public. I’ll be busy soon, so Huaining will depend on your care. You can live as a married couple, get to know each other better, and see if you truly suit one another. I reserve judgment for now, but please understand my concerns. As an elder, I want my child to be happy—and for that happiness to endure, without great upheaval.”

Xue Zuining knew this was a great concession from Madam Lu. Every word was reasonable and unassailable. After careful thought, she smiled and said, “Rest assured, since I have chosen to be with Huaining, I am prepared to face any future difficulties. I will also strive to improve myself, to stand beside him, not hide behind him relying on his protection.”

“That’s good to hear. Thank you for your effort. If you need anything, call me directly. If I’m unavailable, call the housekeeper.” With that, Madam Lu handed over her contact information before returning to watch her sleeping grandson.

If all this is punishment for past wrongs, then letting go might be the best way to atone.