Chapter 9 Returning Your Willingness to You

When it comes to pain, humans should have the memory of a fish; seven seconds of tears are quite enough.

"Grandma..." He pulled her hand and placed it against his chest, feeling the warmth of her palm instill him with boundless strength. He smiled weakly, a spark of hope igniting in his eyes. "Grandma, and... I want to..."

Old Madam Lu closed her eyes for a moment and sighed softly, "Get better first. Once you are well, what is there that cannot be discussed?"

She cast a pleading look at Xue Zuining. "If there are any misunderstandings, clear them up early. Don't let them fester into lingering knots in your heart."

The doctor hurried in to administer more hemostatic measures, bustling about for a while. Su Yi and Chu Ci, who had rushed over from the company, arrived together. They quickly put down their things and inquired about his condition. Once the emergency treatment concluded, they offered many comforting words to ease his mind. Lu Huaining listened quietly, his eyes half-closed, his face etched with exhaustion. After a moment, he said softly, "You all go eat. I'm fine."

The others practically had to force the food into their mouths, tasting nothing at all. After eating and keeping him company for a while longer, a specialist from Beijing arrived. Another consultation followed, but the outlook remained grim.

That evening, Liang Feili also returned, and the group managed to make do for the night in the hospital room. When they woke up, Lu Huaining was still fast asleep, only regaining consciousness around noon.

"Huaining, do you feel any better?"

Lu Huaining did not answer, saying only in a faint voice, "Contact Lin Nan and Chu Ci."

With that, his gaze shifted, and he reached out a hand toward Xue Zuining. She allowed him to take her hand, feeling that his palm still lacked any warmth. Her heart felt as though it had been cast into a bottomless abyss, sinking endlessly yet never hitting the bottom, aching to the point of suffocation.

Chu Ci and Lin Nan arrived one after the other. Finding him unconscious and unresponsive, they could only watch as he firmly gripped Xue Zuining’s hand, as if it were his sole source of life. By the time he woke up, the city lights were already twinkling. Catching sight of the two men, he managed a faint smile and said to Lin Nan, "I called you here because I want to arrange some company matters. I heard Grandma has already been in touch with Lawyer Lin, and there are some details I'd like to supplement. I don't know if I'll pull through this time..."

Another wave of chaos swept through the room as everyone rushed to comfort him or scold him, terrified that the final line of defense in their hearts would shatter.

Lu Huaining observed their expressions, waved a hand dismissively, and motioned for them to be quiet.

Slowly, he shifted his gaze to Chu Ci's face and said solemnly, "Aside from you, I don't know who else would be suitable to entrust the company to. It is time to make amends for what I owe you. Half of my shares will be left to you. I know you don't care about these things, but I cannot be so selfish as to treat you merely as a relative."

Lu Huaining turned his gaze back, looking up at the two of them. "As for the remaining shares, Grandma and Zuining can divide them equally. Grandma has long since stepped back from company affairs; as to how the shares should be arranged—whether through trusteeship or acquisition—you can discuss it with her. As for Zuining's portion... if I give her too much, it might provoke gossip and place too heavy a burden on her. Therefore, the publicly announced result will be that her share belongs to Grandma. I know Grandma will take good care of her..." He coughed a few times before continuing, "Nurture her well; in a few years, she will truly shine."

Just when everyone expected Lu Huaining to unexpectedly leave half of his shares to his trusted aide, the man lying on the hospital bed beckoned to Old Madam Lu. "Grandma, come here."

"Huaining, you—"

Lu Huaining took Chu Ci's hand and placed it gently into the palm of Old Madam Lu, saying slowly, "Call her grandma."

A complex wave of emotions surged within Chu Ci. He opened his mouth slightly, yet the term of address suppressed deep in his heart for so many years ultimately remained unspoken.

Old Madam Lu stared in wide-eyed astonishment as Lu Huaining offered his explanation. "Grandma, Chu Ci is also Father's child; he should rightfully bear the surname Lu. Father told me all about his background back then. The reason we kept it from you was, on the one hand, out of concern that you might act against his mother, and on the other, to spare him from having to live under the stigma of being an illegitimate son once the truth came to light. Father arranged for him to enter the company with this very intention. It is only right that he return to his ancestral roots and family." After pausing to catch his breath, he continued, "Over the years, he has dedicated himself heart and soul to the company and has treated me with the respect due an elder brother. Although he has never once called me brother, I have long since accepted him as my younger brother."

"I understand, I understand everything..." Old Madam Lu did not know whether to rejoice or mourn. She had been kept in the dark for so many years; had it not been for this current crisis, how much longer did he intend to keep the secret?

He did not speak much longer before the doctor entered to prepare for the next treatment. He watched his family and friends leave one by one. Lin Nan had already compiled his instructions, and after verifying they were correct, Lu Huaining signed them into effect. Watching the doctor's white coat constantly sway before his eyes and listening to the steady, rhythmic beeps of the monitors, he pondered for a moment and felt he had no lingering concerns left. With a sudden release in his chest, he slipped back into unconsciousness.

When he woke up again, it was already the dead of night. He twitched his fingers and brushed against soft strands of hair. Turning his head, he saw her sitting in a chair, leaning forward and sleeping soundly with her head resting beside his bed.

At that moment, he was terrified that everything might be nothing more than an illusion, a fleeting mirage, and even more afraid that it was merely a hallucination born of his impending death.

Even if it were, he wished to sink into it forever and never wake up again.

He reached out and gently smoothed her hair. It felt so real, imbuing him with a steady, anchoring strength.

An uncomfortable sensation churned in his stomach, and a wave of dizziness washed over him, making it seem as though fireworks were flashing across his vision. It took him a while to fully regain his clarity. He slid his fingers to her earlobe and gently pinched the soft flesh.

The sleeping figure jolted awake. Xue Zuining lifted her head and, seeing him gazing intently at her, felt her heart leap. Fearing something was wrong, she hurriedly sat up and asked, "You're awake. Are you still in pain?"

With that, she called the doctor over. After a thorough examination revealed no acute changes in his condition, her heart finally settled a little.

Once the room was quiet and only the two of them remained, he asked, "Where is Grandma?"

"We told her to go home and rest first. Older folks tire easily; she might come back tomorrow evening. Su Yi and the others are outside, and Liang Feili had to head back with Chu Ci to help manage company affairs, but they'll all be back tomorrow..."

Lu Huaining stroked her cheek and said softly, "Cat, come lie down with me for a while. Be a good girl, just for a little while."

At that moment, Xue Zuining had no heart to worry about propriety or the setting. She obediently kicked off her shoes and climbed onto the bed. He stretched out an arm, gathered her into his arms, and pulled the blanket up over them both. Staring at her face for a long time, he asked, "Are you still angry with me?"

"Just get better, will you? As long as you get well, I'll forget everything else," she said eagerly. After a brief pause, she added, "I want you to get better. Don't scare me, Huaining..."

"Of course I want to get better. You were so heartless, actually marrying someone else right in front of me. I really want to bite you to death..."

With tears in her eyes, Xue Zuining offered her hand to his lips for him to bite. He smiled faintly, took her hand, and pressed gentle kisses to it. "Fool."

She choked back a sob, "Just get better, please."

He pulled her a little tighter against him, brought his lips to her ear, caught his breath twice, and murmured softly, "Cat, listen closely..."

"Mmm."

"I love you."

Xue Zuining propped herself up on her elbows and stared at him with wide eyes.

He circled her in his arms, lowered his head to press a kiss to her forehead, his warm breath lightly brushing against her face with a trace of dampness. She gazed fixedly into his eyes; those sharp pupils seemed veiled by a fine mist, a faint shimmer of moisture gleaming within them.

"It's been so long, and I never told you... I used to think that since you knew it all, there was no need to say it deliberately. But now I realize that women care about these things; if it isn't spoken aloud, you'll always harbor doubts. I don't know if I'll ever have the chance to say it again in the future, so..."

"Huaining... please don't talk like that, it's terrifying... Don't scare me, you know I hate this. You're going to be fine, the best specialists are all here, you have no reason not to get better, do you hear me, do you hear me..."

He chuckled softly, wiping away the tear tracks on her face. "Now, shouldn't you also tell me your little secret? Tell me how you survived all these years. Hmm?"

"I... I don't know..." Her voice trembled, her throat feeling as though it were being gripped by a giant hand, requiring her utmost effort to utter every single word. "I can't say. Please, Huaining, don't force me. Now is not the time. Later... later I will definitely tell you..." She knew he had been waiting for her explanation, but she had to guard it with her life, because once he found out and intervened, she feared it would spell another disaster.

Lu Huaining smiled slowly, appearing genuinely unwilling to probe further. He wiped away her tears. "Cat, don't cry. If you don't want to say, then don't. If I don't make it, you must live a good life from now on. Perhaps without me, you'll be much happier—you always complained that I bullied you..."

Xue Zuining hugged him fiercely. "Lu Huaining, don't you dare abandon me!" She wiped her face and glared at him through gritted teeth. She remembered that night of their reunion, when her fingertips had traced his name upon the glass and she had asked herself: if this man lost his capital of pride, did it mean he had lost the power to torment her?

Yet in reality, she had poured out everything she possessed to protect the things he cared about, secretly acquiring shares to add weight to his strategic plans.

So, Lu Huaining, hold onto your pride—I'm begging you.

He gently kissed her eyelids, listening as she continued, "Lu Huaining, if you dare to leave, I... I'll forget you by tomorrow..." By the end, she broke down completely, weeping bitterly. "I don't want to forget you, Huaining. Be good, please..." There were still so many things she hadn't yet shared with him, so much happiness waiting for him to partake in. He could not just abandon her like this, abandoning their yet-unseen... daughter.

Lu Huaining patted her back, though his body was utterly exhausted. He murmured lowly, "Stop crying, or when you wake up tomorrow, your eyes will look just like goldfish—so ugly, aren't you ashamed?"

"Just hurry up and get better, please..." Aside from this phrase, she had run out of words.

"Alright, alright. Sleep with me for a little while, and by tomorrow I'll be completely well, okay?"

She stared at him through a hazy veil of tears.

"If you promise not to marry anyone else, I will definitely get well."

"There you go again," Xue Zuining scolded playfully, lightly pounding his shoulder with her small fist. "Look who's talking! You were the one who got engaged to another woman the moment I turned my back."

"Jealous?" Lu Huaining pinched her wrinkled little nose. "That woman is a lesbian; it was purely a transaction between us. She needed a man to stabilize her position, and I needed a woman to clear away gossip. Hey, you couldn't possibly have tortured me for so long just because of that, could you?"

"Of course not." Xue Zuining averted her gaze. So the truth was actually this. Back then, when she heard the news of Lu Huaining's engagement, her heart had turned to ash, too. But everything that followed, and the sight of his unconcealed heartbreak on the screen the day 'City in the Sky' opened two years prior, told her that he had loved her all along.

Therefore, she had chosen to brave the risks of universal condemnation and return here, because here—he was here.

"Cat..." Lu Huaining called her name softly, in a tone that threatened to melt her entirely. "From now on, you belong solely to me. Deal?"

Xue Zuining raised her eyes, her gaze brimming with an elusive, pixie-like charm. "Then I'll marry you..." She buried her head against his chest, her lips pressing gentle kisses against his stomach through the fabric of his hospital gown. "Okay?"

Lu Huaining caught her by the chin. "This is what you said. If you dare to go back on your word when the time comes, see if I don't choke you to death."

"I wouldn't dare..."

Lu Huaining held her hand, leaving a cool kiss upon her palm, his fingertip tracing stroke by stroke across her skin to outline a single character.

Xue Zuining had initially wanted to laugh, tickled by the tingling sensation, but the moment she felt the shape of that character, her smile abruptly froze.

"Are you stunned?" Lu Huaining lightly tapped the tip of her nose and murmured gently against her ear, "Back then, you playfully wrote the character 'Wrong' in my palm. Today, I am returning that choice to you, out of my own free will."