Chapter 46: Tomb of the Heart

To the world, you may be just one person; but to one person, you may be the whole world.

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Lu Huaining smiled gently and said, "Come here, I have something to tell you."

The two looked at each other with tenderness, as if they were the only two people left in the world. Not wishing to disturb them, Madame Lu stood up, walked out of the hospital room, and closed the door behind her.

Seeing that the others had left, Lu Huaining took the opportunity to pull her into his arms. He pressed his lips gently against her eyelids and said in a domineering tone, "Stop crying. Your eyes are swollen like walnuts; if you cry yourself blind, let’s see how you’ll count money then. You little money-grubber, I will definitely get better. Just give me some time."

Hearing his playful words, she couldn't bring herself to smile; she only felt a deep ache in her heart. He pinched her cheek and continued, "But I don't like a bossy wife with swollen eyes. If you want to stay by my side and count money, you need to rest well and smile more. No more crying, understand?"

Though his body was suffering, he only wanted her to be happy.

"Mhm." Xue Zhuining suddenly opened her arms to wrap them gently around his waist, burying her face in his broad chest, and said softly, "Huaining, I will be good to you from now on."

"How good?" Lu Huaining stroked her hair, resting his chin on the crown of her head, and chuckled softly.

"Just very, very good..." Xue Zhuining promised silently in her heart. She would love this man well, even for the part that her mother had missed out on.

Lu Huaining kissed her dark hair. "I’m sleepy. Go tell Grandma to get some good sleep. Her health isn't great to begin with, and she’s been worrying over me; she shouldn't exhaust herself. You should rest early, too. If you sleep beside me like you did last night, I might recover even faster."

"Mhm." She kissed his brow and smiled faintly.

He let go of her, watching as she stood up to straighten her clothes and walked out to the outer room. The door was left ajar, and her soft voice drifted in intermittently. He listened for a while, but eventually, overcome by drowsiness, he fell into a deep sleep.

With Lu Huaining’s condition stabilized and no longer suffering from the recurring hemorrhaging of the day before, the tension in Madame Lu’s nerves eased somewhat, causing the forced energy she had been sustaining to dissipate. Now, she was merely a weary elder. Upon hearing Xue Zhuining convey Lu Huaining’s concern, she felt much more at peace and lay down on the sofa in the outer room. Xue Zhuining had a nurse bring a quilt, and only after seeing that the older woman was asleep did she walk back toward Lu Huaining. Madame Lu stared at her retreating back, lost in thought.

That silhouette was so familiar, as if it were Zhong Yilan from years ago.

After a quick wash, Xue Zhuining returned to lie down beside Lu Huaining. She carefully tucked the quilt around them both and held his arm, feeling warmed by being surrounded by his scent.

She knew this man loved her, and she had no wish to let him down.

Unable to sleep, she gently brushed her fingers over his cheek, then traced them down his neck until they stopped at his stomach. She dared not rest the full weight of her hand on his abdomen for fear of adding any pressure, and the strained posture made her arm ache, yet she did not want to move her hand away. She had suffered from stomach pain herself—it wasn't severe, but it was unbearable—and he had vomited so much blood; how much pain must he be in?

At that time, he must have been thinking of her, thousands of miles away, yet she had been unable to perceive her lover's agony.

She did not know when she finally drifted off. The next morning, when the doctor arrived, he was still asleep. She quickly rose to allow the examination, washed her face, and went out to buy breakfast for herself and Madame Lu. After they ate in silence, they checked on Lu Huaining and, seeing that his complexion had improved, felt their spirits lift. Madame Lu turned her gaze to Xue Zhuining and said, "Miss Xue, come outside with me. It is time we had a proper talk."

Some things cannot be avoided; what must be resolved must be faced head-on.

At these words, Xue Zhuining’s heart felt as if it had been lifted by a string, dangling precariously in mid-air. She clenched her fists secretly and followed Madame Lu out to the outer room, sitting down across from her.

Time passed quietly, with each of them keeping their own counsel.

A woman of such high standing as Madame Lu was naturally accustomed to being strict with everything. Because of her worry for Lu Huaining, she hadn't changed her clothes since arriving, and they were wrinkled, and her complexion was poor. Xue Zhuining feared that now that Madame Lu had calmed down, she might harbor all sorts of displeasure.

But by now, it was no longer something that could be changed by individual effort.

Even before they had ever met, Xue Zhuining could sense the first impression Madame Lu had of her. People tend to unconsciously magnify the flaws of those they dislike. She smoothed her hair, feeling helpless; it was already like this, so she would just have to take things as they came.

However, the gaze Madame Lu fixed upon her was calm, even showing a hint of gentleness, which took her by surprise.

Xue Zhuining steadied her breathing, maintaining a polite smile as she waited for the other to speak.

"Huaining told me everything yesterday. Many facts were truly beyond my expectations. I would like to apologize first for his shameful behavior, and also apologize to you and your mother on behalf of the Lu family. Although I understand that the suffering you endured cannot be made up for by an apology."

Xue Zhuining was startled, then replied, "This is not your fault. As a younger person, I am very embarrassed to have an elder apologize like this."

"It seems Lanlan raised you well. In truth, she was always a generous person; I was the one who misjudged her." Madame Lu sighed apologetically. "It is my own lack of discipline. In the past, I truly neglected Huaining. His so-called marriage was one of appearance only, and furthermore, I kept the truth of his biological mother from him, which is why his father was always cold toward him, and the woman he called 'mother' only put on a show of affection. They were very strict, even harsh, with him, demanding much of his studies and behavior. Admittedly, we did not give him the care a child needs. That he developed such a cold and arrogant nature is our fault."

Xue Zhuining lowered her eyes, remembering how he had once mentioned inadvertently that when he was sick as a child, he had to take his own medicine; the servants only looked to their masters' moods, and no one truly cared for him. Her heart ached at the memory.

"I do not wish to interfere too much in your affair. After all, as a grandmother, I only want my grandson to be happy." Madame Lu sighed deeply, her gaze lingering on the door to the inner room before returning to look intently at her. "Miss Xue, our two families once had quite a connection. I made mistakes in the past, and this time, I do not wish to repeat them."

When one grows old, the heart grows old too. Fighting for more has lost its meaning; all she looked forward to now was the joy of a house full of descendants.

Xue Zhuining stared at Madame Lu, her heart pounding. Faced with such generosity, she didn't even know how to respond or how to explain her four-year disappearance without a trace.

Madame Lu was silent for a long time before saying, "I do not wish to dwell on the grievances of the past, and I believe you can understand how difficult it is to hold a high position in the Lu family. Anyone—but in all fairness, you were innocent, too. Besides, Huaining wronged you; it is his responsibility to spend a lifetime repaying that debt. Since he cannot live without you, I will not make things difficult for you in the future. I tell you all this today only to let you know that your relationship with Huaining cannot be made public yet. After all, his engagement to Wanyi still stands. Once it is made public, it will hurt all three of you. It is better to deliberate and discuss a strategy."

Xue Zhuining bit her lip and said, "I understand."

Madame Lu took a sip of tea, trying to calm her turbulent emotions, and after a while, added, "I heard you were married."

Xue Zhuining’s heart skipped a beat, but she could only nod. Seeing a flash of coldness in Madame Lu’s eyes, her heart jolted.

The shadow on the older woman’s face lasted only a moment before she regained her composure and gentleness. She looked at her and said, "I believe you must have had your own difficulties, but I ask that you do not hurt Huaining again."

Xue Zhuining thought for a moment and replied, "I understand what you mean. I will handle my own affairs as soon as possible and will not cause you any unnecessary trouble."

Madame Lu nodded. "If you need any help, don't hesitate to ask. Huaining and I will naturally not stand by idly. While the Lu family may not be able to command the winds and rain, we still have the capability to be worthy of your trust."

"Thank you, Madame," Xue Zhuining said with a polite smile, though it did not shake her resolve. Some things were best left as they were.

Madame Lu’s expression softened further. "Miss Xue, to stay with Huaining, you will have to face many things. Family factors are one aspect; Huaining carries many responsibilities. His partner cannot simply be a woman who only knows how to manage a household and raise children. I am not asking you to have the same ability to control the whole situation as he does, but you must integrate into his circle. Formal social occasions are not like what you see on television, just scenes to show off jewelry and gowns; connections are built amidst the clinking of glasses. When leaders visit, they bring their wives—you have heard of 'spouse diplomacy,' haven't you?"

Recalling her own youth, Madame Lu advised her, "Improve yourself and support your husband. Although it sounds exhausting, if you don't, the distance between you will grow ever wider. Two people can fall in love based on a moment of passion, but to make it last, it requires management. Life with Huaining is not the romantic, fairy-tale existence a young girl might imagine. Be mentally prepared."

"I understand. Thank you for the reminder, Madame." Had this been four years ago, Xue Zhuining might have been daunted by such a life, but now, she faced it with calm.

Madame Lu continued, "I will ask you to endure a little longer for now. Once Huaining has recovered, I will find a suitable opportunity to make your relationship public. I will be quite busy in the near future, so Huaining will be relying on you for care. You may interact as a married couple and get used to each other to see if you are truly a good fit. I will reserve my judgment for the time being, but please understand my concerns. As an elder, I only hope that my child lives happily, and that this happiness is lasting, without any major ups and downs."

Xue Zhuining knew this was already a massive concession from Madame Lu, and every word she said was reasonable and irrefutable. She pondered carefully and smiled, "Please rest assured. Since I have decided to be with Huaining, I am naturally prepared to face any difficulties that may lie ahead. Furthermore, I will work hard to improve myself so that I can stand by his side, rather than shrinking behind him and relying solely on his protection."

"It is good that you think this way. It will be hard on you. If you need anything, call me directly; if I am unavailable, you may call the butler." With that, Madame Lu handed over her contact information and went to check on her sleeping grandson once more.

If everything now was a punishment for the grievances of the past, then perhaps letting go was the best way to seek redemption.