Chapter 37: Allow Me to Draw Near to You

To the world, you may be just one person;
but to someone, you are the entire world...

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Lu Huaining smiled gently and said, "Come here, I have something to tell you."

The two gazed at each other tenderly, as if the world had narrowed down to just the two of them.

Madam Lu, not wishing to disturb them, stood up, walked outside the ward, and closed the door behind her.

Seeing the distractions leave, Lu Huaining took the opportunity to pull her into his embrace, softly pressing his lips against her eyelids. He spoke with a possessive tone, "No more crying, your eyes are swollen like walnuts. If you cry yourself blind, how will you count the money? You little money-hound. I will get better, just give me some time."

She heard his playful words but could not smile; only a sharp ache welled up in her heart. He pinched her cheek gently. "But I don’t like a boss lady with swollen eyes. If you want to stand by my side and count money, you need to rest well, smile often, and no crying, understood?"

Though his body was wracked with pain, he wished for her happiness.

"Mm." Xue Zuining suddenly opened her arms, wrapping them softly around his waist, burying her cheek in his broad chest. She whispered gently, "Huaining, I will take good care of you from now on."

"How well?" Lu Huaining traced her hair, resting his head against her hairline, then chuckled softly.

"Very, very well..." Xue Zuining silently vowed in her heart. She would love this man deeply, filling the void left by her mother’s absence.

Lu Huaining pressed a kiss on her raven hair. "I’m sleepy. Go tell grandma to get some good rest. Her health isn’t good, and she’s worried about me. She can’t afford to be exhausted. You should rest early too. Sleep beside me like last night; maybe I’ll recover even faster."

"Mm." She kissed his brow and smiled faintly.

He loosened his hold and watched her stand, straighten her clothes, and leave the ward for the outer room. The door was unlocked; her soft voice drifted faintly to him. He listened a while but soon succumbed to drowsiness and slipped into a deep sleep.

Lu Huaining’s condition stabilized; unlike yesterday, there was no recurrent bleeding. Madam Lu’s taut nerves relaxed somewhat, and the energy she had forced herself to summon dissipated. Now, she was just a weary elder. After Xue Zuining relayed Lu Huaining’s concern, Madam Lu felt much comforted and lay down on the sofa in the outer room. Xue Zuining asked the nurse to bring a blanket, and once Madam Lu was asleep, she returned to Lu Huaining’s side. Madam Lu’s gaze lingered on her retreating figure in silence.

That silhouette was so familiar, as if it were Zhong Yilan from years past.

Xue Zuining quickly freshened up before lying down beside Lu Huaining, carefully covering them both with the blanket. She wrapped his arm, enveloped by his scent, feeling warm all over.

This man loved her—she knew it—and she was unwilling to betray that love.

Unable to sleep, her fingers gently traced his cheek, then slid down his neck to rest lightly on his stomach. She dared not press her whole hand there, fearing it might burden him. Her arm grew sore from holding that position, but she did not want to move. She had suffered stomach pain before—not severe but unbearable—and he had vomited so much blood. Just how painful must it have been?

At that time, he was surely thinking of her, thousands of miles away, but she could never truly feel her lover’s pain.

She did not know when she finally fell asleep. Early the next morning, the doctor came in; he was still unconscious. She quickly rose to let the doctor examine him. After washing her face, she bought breakfast for herself and Madam Lu. The two ate quietly and then checked on Lu Huaining. Seeing his complexion improve, their spirits lifted.

Madam Lu glanced at Xue Zuining and said, "Miss Xue, come with me outside. We need to have a proper talk."

Some matters cannot be avoided; they must be faced head-on.

Xue Zuining’s heart fluttered as if caught by a thread hanging in midair. She clenched her fists silently and followed Madam Lu to the outer room, sitting face to face.

Time passed quietly, both understanding the unspoken tension.

Madam Lu, a woman of high standing, was naturally accustomed to strict standards. She had not changed clothes since arriving, worried sick about Lu Huaining. Her sleep-wrinkled clothes and pallid complexion betrayed her fatigue. She feared that once she calmed down, her inner displeasure might surface.

But at this point, nothing could be changed by mere will.

Madam Lu’s first impression of her, even before they met, was typical: people tend to unconsciously magnify the flaws of those they dislike. She smoothed her hair resignedly. It was what it was—she would have to deal with it as it came.

Yet, surprisingly, Madam Lu’s gaze was calm, even tinged with a hint of warmth.

Xue Zuining steadied her breath, maintaining a courteous smile, waiting quietly for her to speak.

"Huaining told me everything yesterday. Many truths caught me off guard. First, I must apologize for his shameful actions, and on behalf of the Lu family, I apologize to you and your mother. Though I understand the suffering you endured cannot be mended by apologies alone."

Xue Zuining was a bit taken aback but replied, "It’s not your fault. It makes me uncomfortable to have an elder apologize to me as a junior."

"It seems Lanlan truly educated you well. She has always been a generous person; I must have misjudged her," Madam Lu sighed, expressing regret. "I failed in raising Huaining. Our so-called marriage was a mere facade, and I even concealed the truth about Huaining’s biological mother. His father was cold to him, and the woman he called mother showed only superficial affection. So, we imposed strict, even harsh, discipline on him academically and behaviorally. We lacked the care a child needs. His cold and aloof nature is our fault."

Xue Zuining lowered her eyes, recalling Huaining once casually mentioning that when he was ill as a child, he had to take his medicine himself; the servants only obeyed the master’s moods, and no one truly cared for him. Her heart ached.

"I don’t want to meddle too much in your affairs," Madam Lu said with a heavy sigh. "But as a grandmother, I want my grandson to live well." Her gaze lingered on the ward door before returning to Xue Zuining. "Miss Xue, our families once had a considerable connection. I have made mistakes before, but this time, I must not err again."

With age comes wisdom—and peace. The battles of the past no longer matter. What she longs for is simply the joy of a full family.

Xue Zuining stared at Madam Lu, heart pounding wildly. She did not know how to respond to such magnanimity or explain her four years of disappearance without a trace.

Madam Lu remained silent for a while, then said, "I don’t want to revisit past grievances, and I believe you understand the difficulties of being part of the Lu family’s high status. No one is entirely blameless, but to be fair, you are innocent. Huaining owes you a lifetime of repayment for his mistakes. He cannot live without you. I will not make things difficult for you in the future. I say all this so you know that your relationship with Huaining must remain confidential for now. After all, his engagement to Wan Yi still stands. If made public, it would hurt all three of you. We must consider carefully before deciding how to proceed."

Xue Zuining pressed her lips together. "I understand."

Madam Lu sipped her tea, trying to calm her turbulent thoughts before adding, "I heard you are married."

Xue Zuining’s heart jolted but she could only nod. Seeing the coldness flash in Madam Lu’s eyes, her heart skipped a beat.

The shadow on Madam Lu’s face lasted but a moment before she regained her calm and warmth. "I believe you have your reasons, but please don’t hurt Huaining anymore."

Xue Zuining considered this and replied, "I understand your concerns. I will resolve my matters as soon as possible and not cause you unnecessary trouble."

Madam Lu nodded. "If you need help, don’t hesitate to ask. Neither Huaining nor I will stand idle. The Lu family may not wield absolute power, but we still have resources you can trust."

"Thank you, madam." Xue Zuining smiled in agreement, though her inner thoughts remained steadfast. This was enough for now.

Madam Lu’s expression softened slightly. "Miss Xue, if you want to be with Huaining, there will be many challenges ahead. Family issues are one thing, but Huaining carries many responsibilities. As his partner, you cannot be just a woman who manages the household. I don’t expect you to have his level of control, but you must integrate into his circle. Formal social occasions aren’t like TV dramas filled with jewelry and gowns; connections are forged over drinks and negotiations. When leaders travel abroad, their spouses accompany them. You’ve heard of diplomatic spouses, haven’t you?"

Recalling her own youth, Madam Lu advised her, "Improve yourself and support your husband. It may sound hard, but if you don’t, the distance between you will grow. Love can be sparked in a moment, but to last, it requires cultivation. Life with Huaining won’t be the romantic, carefree high-society fantasy young girls imagine. Be prepared."

"I understand. Thank you for the reminder, madam." Four years ago, Xue Zuining might have shied away from such a life, but now she faced it calmly.

Madam Lu continued, "Bear with it a little longer. Once Huaining recovers, I will find the right opportunity to make your relationship public. I will be busy for some time, so Huaining will depend on you for care. You can live as a married couple, get to know each other, and see if you truly fit. I remain cautious, but please understand my concerns. As an elder, I want my child to be happy—and for that happiness to last, without great upheavals."

Xue Zuining knew this was already a great concession from Madam Lu. Every word was reasonable and unassailable. She considered carefully, then smiled. "Rest assured, since I have decided to be with Huaining, I am prepared to face any difficulties ahead. I will work hard to improve myself, stand by his side, and not just hide behind him relying on his protection."

"That’s good to hear. Thank you for your efforts. If you need anything, call me directly. If I’m unavailable, contact the housekeeper." With that, Madam Lu handed over her contact information and went to check on her sleeping grandson again.

If all this is a punishment for past mistakes, then letting go might be the best form of atonement.