Chapter 48: Li Li: Today Heaven has truly opened its eyes!

Very well, I am sending you on your final journey now!

Li Li said with a flattering smile all over his face:
"My honored guests, do not be offended, but I have an old rule here for selling wine.
"Payment must be made upfront before any wine is served."
"What of it?"
The short, sturdy fellow, who wore a large crimson flower tucked behind his ear and projected the air of a wealthy fool, laughed:
"Paying before drinking suits me just fine.
"Let me fetch the silver for you right away."
Li Li smiled obsequiously: "That would be best."
The short, sturdy fellow went to open his bundle and pulled out a quantity of broken silver.
Li Li’s large eyes bulged wide:
Goodness gracious!
The bundle was packed to bursting: gold flashed red, silver gleamed white, pearls were round, and gems sparkled!
There were rhinoceros horns from the beasts' heads, and elephant tusks from the beasts' mouths!
In over a dozen years of running a deadly inn, Li Li had never laid eyes on such a massive and lucrative mark!
Overflowing with wealth, truly a magnificent bounty!
Right then and there, greed took root in Li Li's heart:
What if he pocketed this himself instead of reporting it to Jiang Jing, who managed the money and grain?
It was not entirely out of the question. Besides, Shi Qian, his partner in running the inn, had been dispatched to Eastern Capital, leaving Li Li all by himself in the establishment.
Gritting his teeth and narrowing his eyes, Li Li made a decision that directly violated the principle of "acting on behalf of Heaven":
To hell with it!
Taking the silver handed over by the short, sturdy fellow, Li Li went inside to ladle a bucket of wine and slice a platter of beef.
Placing three large bowls and three pairs of chopsticks on the table, Li Li enthusiastically poured wine for the three guests.
The so-called "straining" of wine actually meant using a sieve or fine gauze to filter out impurities.
Wine before filtration was known as "turbid wine."
The poet Bai Juyi once wrote: "Green ants in newly brewed wine, a small red-clay stove. As evening falls and snow threatens, can you drink a cup or not?"
The "green ants" referred to the tiny, dense impurities in the "newly brewed wine" that floated upon the surface like ants.
Without straining, it was hard to swallow, but straining it improved the flavor.
As he poured the wine, Li Li observed their demeanor.
Watching Li Li strain the wine, the short, sturdy fellow boasted of his vast experience wandering the rivers and lakes to his companions:
"Nowadays, the martial world is crawling with scoundrels, and thousands of stout heroes have fallen into their traps.
"They slip knockout drops into the wine and meat, drug you unconscious, rob you of your belongings, and then use human flesh as filling for steamed buns.
"I simply refuse to believe such things happen. Where would such a thing take place?"
Having operated a murder inn and slaughtered countless victims, Li Li possessed more than enough psychological fortitude.
Far from being spooked by having his thoughts hit right on the mark, Li Li grinned broadly and actively chimed in:
"Since the three of you have mentioned it, you shouldn't drink this.
"Both the wine and the meat here have been spiked with knockout drops."
The tall, sturdy fellow also laughed: "This brother here heard us talking about knockout drops and is just having a joke with us."
The three guests assumed he was merely jesting, and the heavy-set fellow even urged him:

"Brother, a bowl warmed up would be just as well."
Li Li put on an accommodating expression: "If you prefer it warm, I shall go and heat it up."
Once in the back kitchen, Li Li seized the opportunity to add the knockout powder.
This knockout powder was miraculous: it dissolved instantly in liquid, leaving neither color nor taste.
Even an experienced murderer like Li Li could neither detect nor taste it.
After warming the wine, Li Li brought it back out, divided it into three bowls, and placed them before the three guests respectively.
"Brothers, bottoms up!"
The tall, sturdy fellow raised his cup in a toast, and the short, sturdy fellow and the heavy-set fellow followed suit, clinking their bowls against his:
"Clang!"
The heavy-set fellow, unable to curb his intense thirst, immediately pressed the bowl to his lips and tilted his head back:
"Glug, glug, glug, glug, glug..."
Li Li was captivated by his heroic manner, but when he turned his gaze back to the tall and short sturdy fellows—
Both brothers had already wiped their mouths, set down their bowls, and loudly praised:
"This wine packs quite a punch!"
Seeing the droplets of wine still clinging to the brothers' mustaches and the empty bowls before them, Li Li's mind finally put aside all worry.
"The guests certainly have a fine capacity for liquor!"
Li Li gave a thumbs-up and feigned the action of pouring more wine for them.
Yet before he could even finish pouring, the heavy-set fellow's eyes glazed over, and drool began to spill from the corner of his mouth.
"Thud!"
The heavy-set fellow pitched forward face-first onto the table, prompting the tall, sturdy fellow to ask in alarm:
"Brother, how is it that a single bowl has made you drunk?"
"Crash!"
The short, sturdy fellow likewise slumped across the table, the large bowl in his hand shattering into smithereens upon the floor!
Shocked, the tall, sturdy fellow pointed at Li Li, opening his mouth to speak, when his eyes slowly rolled upward.
"Plop!"
Like a felled timber log, the tall, sturdy fellow toppled backward, stiff as a board!
In the blink of an eye, all three guests were down.
Li Li burst into hearty laughter: "Heaven must truly be opening its eyes today!
"To deliver these three prime cuts right to my doorstep!"
Smug and triumphant, he stepped forward to drag the heavy-set fellow. Possessing considerable physical strength, Li Li hauled the heavy-set fellow away directly.
Dragging him all the way down to the human-flesh processing workshop beneath the tavern, he placed him upon the butchering bench and returned to fetch the tall, sturdy fellow.
Since the tall, sturdy fellow had fallen backward in a rigid posture, Li Li bent down to grab his ankles.
To his utter astonishment, however, the supposedly drugged tall, sturdy fellow suddenly unleashed a "rabbit kicks the hawk" maneuver!
"Wham! Wham!"
The tall, sturdy fellow's massive feet slammed into Li Li's chest with the force of iron hammers!
"Boom—"
Li Li was launched backward like a cannonball, crashing violently against the wall!
"Pfft—"
Looking up to the heavens, Li Li spewed a mouthful of old blood, staring in disbelief as the tall, sturdy fellow sprang back to life with a carp's leap!

Drawing his blade in a flash, the tall, sturdy fellow lunged forward in a single bound:
"Swish—"
A blade gleamed, and a flash of blood appeared!
As luck would have it, after spewing his mouthful of blood, Li Li's body swayed just enough to narrowly dodge the strike.
He dodged it, yet not entirely.
The tall, sturdy fellow's blade cleaved diagonally across his shoulder!
With a single stroke, Li Li's right arm was severed and sent flying!
Instantly, half of Li Li's body was dyed crimson with blood...
"Don't kill me!"
Terrified out of his wits and his soul flying apart, Li Li screamed in panic:
"I am a mem—"
"Swish—"
Without a word of explanation, the tall, sturdy fellow delivered a horizontal slash!
With just that one blow, Li Li's legs were gone as well!
"Plop!"
Both legs flew off separately from the crotch, soaring away to the left and right as Li Li dropped heavily onto his backside!
At that moment, the short, sturdy fellow also rushed forward, expertly grabbing Li Li's topknot and jerking it upward!
Compelled by the force, Li Li involuntarily tilted his chin upward, exposing his throat!
"Humph!"
The tall, sturdy fellow sneered, gripped the ghost-head broadsword with both hands, swung it in a full arc, and brought it down toward Li Li's neck!
At that very instant, three stout men rushed out from the inner quarters, shouting in alarm at the sight before them:
"Stay your hand!"
"Swish—"
Heedless of the cry, the tall, sturdy fellow severed Li Li's neck without a moment's hesitation!
Li Li's head, as large as a peck-measure, flew off into the air, while a gush of blood mist erupted from his neck cavity!
Reflexively, the tall, sturdy fellow took a half-step backward to avoid the erupting spray of crimson mist.
Neither his body nor his blade was stained with blood.
...
Crimson whiskers scattered in wild disarray, scarlet tiger-eyes opened wide.
The terror of the Ridge-Unveiling killings, the netherworld's life-demanding judge.
At least Mother Sun put on pretense with her "three principles of non-killing," but Li Li did not even bother to act anymore.
A murderous fiend like him? Why spare even a chicken's neck!
Staring fiercely at the three stout men, the tall, sturdy fellow grinned savagely:
"Stay whose hand?"
[Ranked third on the new historical books chart, craving recommendation and monthly votes to keep climbing higher~]